It's amazing how clear things become, like waking up and realizing you have been asleep.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Dust

Sometimes I feel I am getting left behind.
This world moves much too fast.
The days bleed together like a mess of melted crayons.
I am still on the previous page
and a new chapter is already beginning.

All my efforts turn to dust
While those who have hurt me find their place.
They find salvation and I am left with nothing
only a fistful of broken dreams and battered memories.
When will it be my turn?

I have tried too hard and cried too much
and still it is not over.
Why should they be rewarded for what they've done?
While I am left here wanting,
Wondering what I've done wrong.

Sometimes this life is just too much
I cannot feel anything anymore
I cannot pretend to be happy if this smile feels so false
I have nothing to give you, so stop asking.
One day there will be sunshine
but today there is only dust.


Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Stagnant

I breathe in and am not fulfilled
The air is thick and stained with disappointment
My voice is weak and cracks from lack of use.
Can you hear me?
I'm not sure I know what to say.

My feet have not moved in so long they are starting to grow roots
but the ground I stand upon unstable.
I am paralyzed by painful mediocrity.
For an artist it is never enough.

One of these days I will leave here.
I cannot condone this existence.
I cannot keep this atrocious smile on my face
What happens when there is no more energy left to care?
They say this place is not so bad
But it's beginning to feel like hell.

This life is beautiful, but without meaning
There must be something more to say.
Waiting for the wind to pick me up and carry me away
It is time for the cards to fall
to find out what we're really made of.
I cannot breathe here anymore
I cannot tell you how I feel
I cannot feed my soul with cardboard.
But I cannot walk away.


Heart & Soul

My Soul is filled with wandering blood lust
I knew I should have never let you go
Who were you when I was looking for gold?
Found the rainbow but no magic.

It hurts to breathe in this place
My heart is dying living in this life
We all need more attention.
I'm sorry I never showed you how I felt.

Foothills in the distance scream of forgotten adventure
This is not what it was suppose to be.
How can I possibly survive here?
I think I'll need another drink.

Please tell me it's not too late, that it's not all gone to the wayside
Please tell me there will be more if I wake up tomorrow
I'll be a good girl, I promise
Although probably not.

My soul is dying in this place
Paralyzed by stagnant inefficiency
This is not what it was suppose to be
My heart bleeds for something more.
Please tell me there will be more.
There must be something more.